“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.”
–Willie Nelson
Do you want to train your brain or scare your brain? Brain understand certain language specifically. You have to be very much careful while uttering some words. Whenever I used to go out in car, I used to utter, “There should not be traffic jam today!” My brain must have not listened, “There should not be.” It must have heard, “Traffic Jam.” I always trained my brain for pain words and not happy words. But after reading the book ‘What To Say When You Speak To Yourself’, I changed the vocabulary. I started using ‘clear traffic’ in stead of ‘traffic jam’. When language changed, my brain started following positive words which I spoke. The words did not make immediate positive effect on my brain but most of the people around me were more happy with the loving words.
Replace Pain Words With Happy Words
My boss used to utter most of the time as following when work is not accomplished by his employees.
“I am an idiot, nothing is working right!”
“I do not understand your language!”
“I will go mad!”
And similar things always resulted for him.
Result Oriented Focus
You have to be always careful when you talk to yourself. Whenever I told to my kids during their childhood not to throw the torn papers on the floor, they were more prone throwing a couple of times more then the usual. I replaced my language especially after completion of my masters in psychology,
“I have good children, they never through garbage on the floor, they always throw them in dust bin.”
To my surprise they started doing same thing.
Sometimes my doctor was confused when I said,
“My headache is becoming alright now”
He said, “Then what for you have come to me?”
I knew later on that there was deep sense of recording in subconscious mind. My all friends were making fun of my statements but later on they were astonished with the incredible results I had achieved.
Earlier I used certain vocabularies as following,
“ There is no problem!”
“ No bad experience!”
“ I never get stress!”
I never realised that subconscious mind did not clearly distinguished sentences. It understood word problem, stress, bad etc. Then later on I started amending my words as following,
“ I am calm!”
“ I have nice experience!”
“ I have pleasure!”
I never allowed my subconscious mind to listen the undesirable words. Therefore my responses were pleasant and I derived desirable results.
Associate Pleasure To Your Action Steps
The pain-pleasure principle lies at the core of everything we do, and of everything we are. Our beliefs, values and psychological rules are all built upon this principle. The decisions we make, the actions we take, and the habits we indulge in, are all based on this principle.
In fact, every part of your psyche is influenced in some way by the pain-pleasure principle. You are therefore who you are today because of how you have interpreted and acted upon the experience of pain and pleasure in your life. And as we all know action always begins with a decision.
Whatever work we carry out or action we undergo we do not normally associate pleasure with the actions. We always link or associate pain words with the task and therefore our mind always understands that there is always displeasure in actions or work.
I used to tell my students that I am getting up early morning 5 am with great difficulties, although I feel sleepy and wanted to sleep for some more time but I struggle and get up because I have to finish my hard task even if I feel stressed. But in stead of this undesirable language, I should use as following,
I have a pleasure to get up early morning at 5 am with a very excited feelings. I will raise myself for a beautiful victory hours and start my day’s work with very fresh mind!
Always associate pleasure to any opinions, suggestions, input or critiques, and to your surprise the loving, nurturing and caring support you deserved will definitely grow up.
Love And Accept Yourself
Self acceptance means accepting yourself as you are. True acceptance of self comes from the acceptance of the things you like about yourself and in the same manner, you do not like things about yourself. It is an active process of involving a willingness to experience thoughts, feelings and emotions without denial. Opposite to this is the evasion and therefore it leads to rejection of self.
If you honestly accept your reality and facts and do not repress, you can change the things for better. By acceptance of true reality of situation or event you are ready to face challenges and it will determine your role how healthy you might be in future.
Negative emotions about self always lead to large number of diseases which may succeed for rest of your life. The forgiveness to others proves to be healthy sign for not only for other people but also for the self. A son who was scolded before two decades was cause of couple of physical and mental ailments even after the death of his father. People do not easily forget the insults but once you accept the situation or event and forgive the people, you may have healthy mind and live a very peaceful life.
Take Away
1. Always carry good vibes. Define fear as ‘Feeling Exited And Raising.’
2. If you do not love yourself, you can not love anybody.
