JOMO: Joy Of Missing Out

When the advertisement for a sports bicycle with gears was shown in one of the hoardings that the last date to get the item with a 50% discount was up to next Saturday, I was extremely excited to buy but at the same time felt anxious and stressed as I did not have sufficient money before my next salary date.

The definition of FOMO is Fear Of Missing Out is,

Anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, is often aroused by posts seen on social media.

And that of JOMO called Joy Of Missing Out is,

Pleasure is derived from living quietly or independently without feeling anxious that one is missing out on exciting or interesting events that may be happening elsewhere.

FOMO is the opposite of JOMO or vice versa.

To be very frank, I did not know the term FOMO till I became a writer, and later on, while studying psychology I could understand the meaning of JOMO i.e., Joy of Missing Out.

Most advertisers use the technique of FOMO. And the concept that most of us have heard, used, and experienced FOMO but very few have bothered to know the exact interpretation of the term JOMO. I can say that it is a shameful affair for you and me because JOMO is a meaningful ethos to embrace.

Learn To Adopt JOMO

Think that one day you stayed at home and did not go to a stadium to enjoy a cricket match with friends. You would have enjoyed the excitement of the international match but you could not make it due to some valid reasons.

Well, let me ease your anxiety. If the cricket match is the love of your life, you will find them again and enjoy it at another time. And maybe, the next match at another stadium might show up for you on another occasion when you wish most. So, accept with a positive mindset that you chose to act. This may be equally the same for your movie, time with your partner, spending quality time with family, or a vacation with children at remote place of your choice.

Enjoy and embrace the JOMO — and do not spend the entire time thinking about what it is that you might be missing out on if only you had made another choice! Missing out can be a joy because it means that you incorporated what you wanted to do. You listened to your insight or you didn’t, but either way, you made a choice and now you are where you are and you can take a deep breath and clasp it.

JOMO is a wonderful technique. It allows you to enjoy your decision and permits you to choose what it is that you want to do, and not what you think you should have done. Once JOMO is in the vicinity of your mind, you won’t be able to let it go or you will never wish to. From a psychological point of view, I can tell you that it may take some time to actualize but once you make it a practice, you may likely stick with it.

JOMO Versus FOMO

How can you make sure that you have JOMO instead of FOMO?

When you are dining in a restaurant the food on the plate of the opposite table looks tastier than yours. You might think that there was a better choice than the one you made. You may feel, if you are forced to choose between two plates, you chose the wrong menu. You try to decide that you would have been happier at a choice of neighbor that you missed out on. The same feeling may be true in the case of your spouse or a house you selected. And that is sometimes intensified when you later converse with people who chose differently, who outburst about how wonderful it was. Assigning it edifies your decision like “best food I ever had.”, “best dining experience I ever had.”, “best meal of the year for me” and more. So, remember, when you get into that FOMO state, make sure that this technique is followed in your mind’s eye.

A couple of wise words courtesy of your good friends mean that you can only choose one good item or event at a time. You made a choice that was the best option for you at that moment, and while you missed out on one thing you experienced something else! And would have never been honoring you a fantastic and enjoyable thing to be celebrated? So let the envy — both pre and post-choices — go. Welcome the joy of what you did experience. Missing out can be awesome, too my friends.

So next time, instead of bubbling in FOMO I recommend you to grasp JOMO and be content, thrilled, and get delighted with your choice, with your life, and with your decision. Because after all, no one can make you upset or joyful without your consent.

Photo by Allef Vinicius on Unsplash

Embracing the joy of missing out

According to psychology [1] today, you can embrace the joy of missing out as below,

JOMO (the joy of missing out) is the emotionally intelligent antidote to FOMO and is essentially about being present and content with where you are in life. You do not need to compare your life to others but instead, practice tuning out the background noise of the “shoulds” and “wants” and learn to let go of worrying whether you are doing something wrong. JOMO allows us to live life in the slow lane, appreciate human connections, be intentional with our time, practice saying “no,” give ourselves “tech-free breaks,” and permit us to acknowledge where we are and to feel emotions, whether they are positive or negative. Instead of constantly trying to keep up with the Joneses’, JOMO allows us to be who we are in the present moment, which is the secret to finding happiness. When you free up that competitive and anxious space in your brain, you have so much more time, energy, and emotion to conquer your true priorities.

Be intentional with your time: Schedule things that are important to you whether it is working out, meeting a friend for coffee, writing that book, or completing a work project. Make your time your priority instead of wasting time worrying about what other individuals are doing or thinking.

Permit yourself to live in the present: If you are having a bad day, be easy on yourself and treat yourself to a relaxing evening. If you just received good news, then take a moment to embrace it and celebrate. If you feel that you are in constant competition with someone on social media, then re-assess why you are feeling this way.

Embrace tech-free time: Unsubscribe from social media accounts and unfollow individuals who trigger your FOMO or cause you any type of negativity. Set daily limits to how long you can spend on social media or delete certain social media apps from your phone so you can only status scroll when you are at home on your computer.

Practice saying “No”: You do not always have to go to that event or take that phone call. Sometimes saying, “no” is the best kind of self-love. Even if you want to help someone but feel it will harm you, say “no,” to protect yourself. Self-care and self-love start by saying, “no.”

Experience real life (not social media life): JOMO allows you to have more free time by eliminating wasted time spent scrolling social media feeds. Instead of spending your free moments in the drama of social media, email, and text messages; what if you chose to disconnect and do the things that you enjoy such as cooking, spending time outdoors, and spending time with your family?

Slow down: Take time to think before you speak, embrace the quiet, and use time driving in traffic or waiting in lines to sit with your thoughts or listen to a book. Slowing down can increase our creativity, which we can harvest into other productive avenues and projects in our life.

[1] Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com

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Krgoswami

Former aircraft engineer IAF, Retired Branch Manager SBI, Psychologist, Best Selling Author & Defence Recruitment Trainer https://academy.krgoswami.com